Often times women are judged when they have children with multiple partners. However, in 2011 a study from the University of Michigan showed that 28 percent of U.S. women with two or more children have children with more than one man.
So if it’s really not all that uncommon, why do we judge? Women are fully capable of raising their children regardless of the number of partners they have.
Take Kate Winslet for example who expressed her displeasure with the press after the birth of her third child with her third husband.
“No one has a right to comment on anyone’s life or the choices I do or don’t make. It’s very easy to be judgmental until you know someone’s truth. People have no idea at all.”
Winslet, a celebrated actress, is a mother to three children, who all have different fathers.
Following a four-year relationship with actor-writer Stephen Tredre, and then his eventual death from bone cancer, Winslet began a relationship with Jim Threapleton after meeting him on the set of Hideous Kinky. The two married in 1998 and in 2000 they welcomed their first child, Mia.
But shortly after Mia’s birth, their relationship unraveled and the couple split.
It didn’t take long until she met Sam Mendes who offered her a part in a play. She turned it down and instead began dating him.
The couple married in 2003 and that same year their son Joe was born.
However rumors began to swirl that Mendes was having an affair with actress Rebecca Hall, and by 2010 the couple split and in 2011 they finalized their divorce.
Shortly after she met Richard Branson’s nephew, Edward Abel Smith and within a year the two married. The couple’s son Bear was born in 2013.
While not too many years separate her two eldest children, there is a large age gap between Joe and Bear, a gap that she has admitted has presented its challenges.
“Logistically, that is very complicated because it means different schools, different pick-up times, different after-school clubs, and so on. And emotionally too, they all have very different things they need from me,” she told Harper’s Bazaar.
Despite the gap, she loves being involved in her children’s lives because she wants her children to remember her for being their mother not for her job.
“I want them to look back and remember my chicken soup and my packed lunches and that it was me on the school run,” she said.
“I don’t want them to feel that they are any different because of my job.”
Winslet also made sure to protect her children from social media by staying offline and warning her children about the dangers.
“We live in a world where we have to be aware of all this stuff, unfortunately. And it’s feeding this young generation in a way that’s beyond terrifying, so normal friendships aren’t even normal friendships anymore because, half the time, they seem to be forging relationships with people they’ve never met,” she said.
Of course it also helps that her current husband Smith has been a massive help with all of the children.
“Thank God for Ned — really. He’s just so incredibly supportive, and he’s so much fun. He’s absolutely everything to me. And to all of us,” she told WSJ Magazine.
Even with a busy schedule and now grown children, Winslet still tries to make time for everyone.
“Quite honestly, I just try to do everything with a spring in my step and a smile in my heart, and even if I’m exhausted, I just try to get on with it. I think it’s all about having that ‘can-do’ attitude, learning to multi-task, and being able to be truly present and calm.”
I agree. It is no one else’s business but a parent’s how a child is raised. Why do we care so much if a woman has multiple children with multiple partners? All that matters if that she’s able to give them a loving home.
Please share with all the Kate Winslet fans you know.
